What it is ain’t exactly plausible entertaining or worth your money
[ Editors note: The following review reveals plot points that some readers might consider spoilers. Proceed with caution. ]
There’s a malicious force at work in The Happening . Early on in the film people in New York’s Central Park suddenly stab themselves in the neck with hairpins. And later in the day East Side construction workers start throwing themselves off high-rise girders (well after a dirty joke or two. Hey it is New York and these are construction workers y’know.)
Is it a terrorist attack the popular consensus of many along the East Coast who cram into trains and transit buses to get away from what’s “happening?” Or is it something else? Nuclear discharge? Global warming? Nope. Not to give too much away here — although it’s tough to actually put the real culprit in print without bursting into giggle fits — but Mother Nature is involved. And man is she pissed.
Honestly what can you say about a film in which Marky Mark the hero instructs a group of victims to run from the wind? Yes those wide-eyed dopes are sprinting away from a nice cool breeze . Don’t let the gust getcha gang or you’re likely done. Oh and while you’re at it don’t step on the grass or you might just get the urge to climb into a lion cage at the local zoo and let the big kitty gnaw on your limbs.
It’s like writer-director M. Night Shyamalan the creative well having gone bone-dry long ago was so desperate for ideas that he sat down for a Saw and Hostel marathon and then substituted his usual twisty ending for an exercise in how to creatively kill people. See in The Happening once the wind trees shrubs and produce department do their thing characters are overcome with suicidal urges. On-the-spot thinking has never been quite so dangerous — as mentioned we get death by giant cat plus death by industrial lawn mower death by skull bashing against window etc.
What happened to Shyamalan and how long can he survive on his Sixth Sense billing? His stuff used to tingle with suspense — now it drips with absurdity. The Happening isn’t an overly stylish movie borrowing elements from doom-and-gloom flicks like War of the Worlds and The Mist. Mark Wahlberg puts in one of his worst efforts in a long long time but then given the subject matter he can be excused. Ditto for Zooey Deschanel who plays his frustrated wife with little gusto. Kudos to Betty Buckley though who pops up on the home stretch as a crazy old lady (described by Deschanel as “a little too Exorcist-y”) and treats us to one of the funnier performances we’ll see this year. No it wasn’t meant for laughs… but in a mess like this enjoy what you can.
