Cult western is now 12 per cent more insane
We’ve seen Apocolypse Now Redux (2001). Now a little known (yet much hated) pseudo-western called Straight to Hell (1986) has just received the extended special edition treatment.
Wait really? Just who the hell did they make that for?
Me probably. I love Straight to Hell. This new version promises a smattering of deleted scenes and new CGI footage of Courtney Love’s skeleton screaming inside a burning car. Sold!
Having almost worn my old pan-and-scan VHS copy of Straight to Hell down to the nub I’ve been interested in getting myself a digital copy — but not interested enough to shell out $260 on Amazon for the out-of-print DVD. Luckily director Alex Cox has just completed work on this revamped version of the film now called Straight to Hell Returns (2010) which despite the title is not a sequel. It’s more of a slightly tweaked director’s cut coming in at about five minutes longer than the original. How does it stack up to the original edit? Well I’ll tell you but first understand that spoilers are a necessary part of this analysis. Still I wouldn’t worry too much about that even if you haven’t seen the film.
Straight to Hell isn’t the kind of film that can be spoiled — it’s a weirdly plotless deconstruction of various spaghetti western tropes that’ll either tickle your fancy or leave you bored and annoyed. I’ve never read a positive review of the original film but everyone I’ve showed it to has enjoyed it. Maybe it’s a Calgary thing? After all a town that pretends to be a cowboy frontier village every year at Stampede is bound to be a bit weird and cynical over the whole western genre and might be more receptive to laughing at its pointlessness. And believe me laughing at pointlessness is most of the fun here.
The plot (such as it is) remains intact. Three hired killers (and one pregnant woman) screw up an assassination by oversleeping. They rob a bank and skip town winding up in a dusty secluded village ruled by the vicious McMahon family. After accidentally earning the clan’s trust (by shooting some troublemakers) the gang hangs around for a few days doing pointless and ridiculous things. From time to time someone will sing a song and then a title card reading “Day Two” (or whatever) springs up. Everybody starts to get twitchy from greed sexual tension and coffee addiction. Finally a couple of murders are blamed on the newcomers and a big ol’ shootout ensues.
A midnight screening of the original Straight to Hell at a repertory cinema taught me three things:
1. Lots of people enjoy Straight to Hell as much as I do;
2. Every single thing said or done by George (Miguel Sandoval) gets a big laugh; and
3. The audience laughs hysterically every time someone dies. It’s true — each death plays like a punchline. Will the new digital blood affect this?
Previously deleted scenes are restored and are short enough to not make much of a difference. Most of the shooting deaths have new CGI blood effects added and are quite skilfully done. Still it’s a bit distracting to see a beloved film meddled with as we all learned to our cost when the “special editions” of the original Star Wars trilogy came out. Why mess with something that worked fine the first time especially in this case where the film seemed to work largely by accident? There’s extra footage of Karl the weiner vendor (Zander Schloss) being mistreated which the film already had too much of. They even mess up his death scene adding four bullet hits to the poor guy’s torso while we only hear three gunshots. Plus Sy Richardson still says “just a waste of three bullets” right afterwards! Come on guys it’s your movie! Count the damn gunshots!
Even more distracting are the CGI animated skeletons that have been added to the film. At one point the new version cuts to a shot of a living wolf skeleton howling at the moon. Huh? Why? Plus the film now ends with the animated skeleton of George suddenly standing up from the rubble of a burned house brandishing a knife.
Despite these unwelcome intrusions I eventually deemed the film unruined. At first I considered Straight to Hell Returns to be an unacceptably altered version of the delightful original but by the end I conceded that the soul of the film was intact and that this version would be suitable to show to first-time viewers. It really is a lot like the newly polished (and fucked up) versions of Star Wars. You might grumble about how Greedo’s death scene really went but new viewers probably don’t care. The DVD keeps the same bonus features of Anchor Bay’s previous disc including the fun “Back to Hell” featurette and the outstanding audio commentary track with director Alex Cox and actor/co-writer Dick Rude with a few new audio snippets from Alex spliced in whenever the new footage shows up. If you’ve got the old DVD hang onto it but if not this new version is worth adding to your collection.
